The 2012 inductees to the Naismith Memorial Basketball Hall of Fame were announced today, and as usual, they’re pretty awesome. Congratulations, everyone! (Except you, Reggie Miller.)
But we don’t want anyone to get too big of a head, so we put together a quick guide to some of the inductees that highlights not only the best but also the worst things about them. (Especially Reggie.)
The Best Things about Reggie: Career 39.5% 3-pt shooter. Scored 18.2 points per game over 18 seasons. Five-time All Star.
The Worst Things about Reggie: Huge asshole. Never won a championship. Terrible, terrible announcer. Taunted Spike Lee.
The Best Things about Don: Revolutionized the way NBA teams play offense. Made Dirk Nowitzki and Steve Nash into what they are. Introduced Hack-a-Shaq.
The Worst Things about Don: Never won a championship. Left Golden State in kind of a mess last year. Tended toward melodrama.
The Best Things about Ralph: IS SEVEN FOOT FOUR. Won the Naismith Award, given to the country’s best college basketball player, three times. Was a four-time NBA All-Star from 1984-1987.
The Worst Things about Ralph: Never won a national championship at Virginia. After 1987, NBA career was derailed by injuries.
The Best Things about the Red Heads: Women’s basketball trailblazers. The female version of the Harlem Globetrotters. Won 70% of their more than 200 games per season from 1936-1986.
The Worst Things about the Red Heads: None. They’re just awesome.
The Best Things about Jamaal Wilkes: Won two NCAA championships under John Wooden and four NBA championships with the Warriors and Lakers. Great defender.
The Worst Things about Jamaal Wilkes: Has had an unfair amount of success.
The Best Things about Phil Knight: Co-founder/chairman/warlord of Nike*, which has revolutionized athletic apparel and redefined the aesthetics of sports. Has given tons of money to his alma mater, the University of Oregon.
The Worst Things about Phil Knight: Co-founder/chairman/warlord of Nike*, a global network of sweatshops and mind-numbing capitalist megalith.
Katrina McClain, player
Hank Nichols, referee
Lidia Alexeeva, coach
Don Barksdale, player
Mel Daniels, player
Chet Walker, player